Thursday, March 6, 2014

Blame it on the (non-existent) rain


My friends from high school (and in fact, college, as well, few they may be) will be the first to tell you that in those days, I would be the last to care what others thought of me. Yes, believe it or not, I wasn't this vain – yet (though I still don't care). Truth be told, there were few things that really, truly worried me.


Of course, as an adolescent, and as a student filled with hopes and dreams (though I still am), fewer mistakes were made. No wings have yet been clipped.

As much as I still love and cherish this spring blazer I thrifted years ago, and was supposed to serve as my jacket yesterday, I just had to let it go as something that doesn't suit or interest me anymore. All I can do now is feel its wonderful fabric and hope to find something like it in the future.


Mind you, I used the plaid umbrella not as mere monochromatic prop. It was really gloomy and looked like rain yesterday morning – even though I was also wearing, at least in these pics (not seen), espadrilles.

Yokata worn as jacket, thrifted
Polo shirt, Y-3
White jeans, Maison Martin Margiela
Braided belt, Nautica
Umbrella: I have no idea


Ah, to be brave and fearless once again! (Not to mention umbrella-less and foolish.)


But at this age, whatever fears I have left – or still harbor – are more universal. Like growing old alone, or dying unfulfilled. You know, the more morbid stuff that are truly terrifying.


I'm thankful that I still look like this at 32, even though I really have to pay more attention to grooming (visit the dermatologist more often, definitely, but start using anti-aging products, maybe).


Am saying this as a matter of stern belief: I look young because, miracle of miracles, I stay positive. Of course, no small thanks due to my parents' genes.


Whatever hell I kept on yapping about in the last two months that I have escaped still exists, inside me, but I'm thankful that I've been able to contain it and turn it into fire that cannot be extinguished.

EDIT: In case you're wondering what the yokata looks like tied.

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